Happy 2nd Birthday, Rhian Kelle!

Today is our panganay’s 2^nd birthday and our birthday too, as this marks our 2 years of being a good, lovable and responsible parents to our children. Our journey towards for parenthood is not easy; it requires lot of patience, understanding and love especially we have children with a very small age gap. Being a mother is truly the toughest job ever. But today, I’m so happy to share with you how grateful we are for having such a very loving and charming kid and her name is Rhian Kelle.

I know for now, she cannot understand everything I tell her, even this letter on her birthday but someday when she grew up I know she will be proud of us on how we raised her and Rhaine. This post is purely a message from a mother’s heart and as I write this post, may nakahandang tissue paper sa tabi ko kasi ngayon palang emotional na ko.

Dearest Rhian,

Happy 2^nd Birthday Anak! Time flies so fast and I can’t believe you are already 2 years old, parang kelan lang since I gave birth to you. Rhian, you know what I smile and at the same time feeling nostalgic whenever I recall on how we found out that we’re pregnant with you, it was unexpected. Your Daddy and I are married for 10 months before you came, I tried different test and took lots of medicines for me to conceive. I need to visit my OB doctor every week to check if there’s any improvement about my PCOS, we pray and ask for the Lord’s guidance as we prepare for your arrival. We went to Padre Pio Chapel in Libis, we offered prayers for me to conceived, and every night your dad and I pray together and hoping for a good result. We tried everything anak and one day during my weekly check-up (ultrasound), I was surprised when my OB doctor told me that I am 6 weeks pregnant with you. I was teary eyed when I heard that, your Dad was not around because he bought me some vitamins to take at the drug store and leaving the ultrasound room left a big mark on my heart.

As soon as I heard the good news, I immediately informed your dad about it. I saw him in DQ Store at the ground floor in MMC and told him “I’m Pregnant!”.  He was shocked, totally shocked. You dad is the happiest man that day; he immediately purchased a pregnancy test kit to just to confirm and then two lines appeared, POSITIVE! We’re pregnant!

My pregnancy with you is not easy; I was confined for 1 week due to internal bleeding. We are so worried, I need to be strong for you anak, your dad, your lolo, lolas, titas and titos are with me throughout my pregnancy journey, they are very supportive and excited to see you darling. After my confinement, I was advised to be at bed rest for 2 weeks for your safety, I don’t care about my work that time since all I want is for you to be safe. Every time I heard your heartbeat, every time I felt your kick and hiccups I got emotional knowing that you are a fighter, and that inside my tummy is a gift of life the Lord gave us.  I have no decent sleep during my pregnancy because all you want to do is to kick me so hard and you want to play with me during midnight.

The day has finally arrived; it was Sunday January 19 around 9:30pm.  I was in the kitchen that time; your dad is currently watching Gandang Gabi Vice when my water bag broke. If you want to know the details about how I gave birth to you, click here anak.

January 20, 2014 8:21am

The first few weeks have been a rollercoaster for us. Believe me, we’re so nervous, excited scared, tired, drain and sleepless.  There are times that I cry because I’m really tired and I want to sleep, but every time you smile at me my heart melts and grabe nawawala pagod ko. It’s like a magic! I breastfed you since day 0 until you turn 1 year old. My heart is crying when the doctor told me that I should stop breasfeeding you since I got pregnant with your baby sister. I cannot breastfeed you because I experience contractions during your feeding time. Parang hinihiwa yung puso ko anak, I need to think of your baby sister and I think you too, I even consult your dad about my situation and told me that we should train you to bottle feeding with formula milk for the sake of your baby sister. Alam mo kung gano kasakit yun, since I make a promise to breastfed you until you reach 2. During the first night, when you constantly crying out loud because you want to suck on my nipple, my heart breaks into pieces. Ang sakit sa dibdib na makita kang umiiyak at makatulog kakaiyak. This is our situation for 1 week until you become familiarized with the formula milk that we gave.

Purely Breastfeeding Baby

 Time flies so fast; you develop many things and achieve so many milestones during your 1^st year. You’re such a brave little girl, a loving and sweet Ate to Rhaine, you bring us so much joy and love in the family and still you continue to make us proud of you. I just want to take this opportunity to say SORRY, sorry if napapalo kita, sorry if I hurt you, sorry if nasisigawan kita at your very young age, I’m sorry if my time with you is not enough since I’m working from Monday – Friday, I’m sorry if sometimes I need to leave you because of some events that I need to attend, I’m sorry if sometimes you feel jealous to your sister and you think I don’t love you anymore, please don’t think that anak because I love you. You, your dad and your baby sister are my life and everything. I am not a perfect mother anak, but I try my best to be the BEST MOM for you and to Rhaine.

 I’m happy today because I saw you growing up like a little girl I want to be. Thank you anak for your love, for the joy you bring in our family, for taking care of your baby sister na kahit na hindi ka pa marunong mag alaga talaga whenever I told you to look at your baby sister while I’m away talagang nasa tabi ka nya and you hold her hands. It’s a priceless moment whenever I saw you doing that to her. Thank you for helping me in raising your sister kahit na sa maliit na paraan, thank you anak.

Now, it’s your special day. Your dad and I have a simple plans and surprises for you. I hope, well I believe naman you will enjoy your day kasi for you as long as we were together ikaw na ang pinaka masayang bata sa buong mundo. Please anak, stay as sweet and charming as you are ha, I want to cherish every single day with you and Rhaine. Always remember that I am your best friend, you can always count on me and shares your dreams and problems, I will never allow anyone to hurt you and your sister because as long as I live, I will take care of you no matter what happens, and kahit na mag asawa kayo ng kapatid mo, you and Rhiane will be my forever babies okay.

Again, Happy 2^nd Birthday ChingChing. Daddy, Mommy and Baby Rhiane loves you so much!