Mommy Diaries: Meet Rhian’s Guardian

I read some stories about their yaya woes from (Maan of Little Pieces of Happy, Frances of Topaz Horizon and Jen of It’s Mommy! Wow!) Actually at first I was hesitant to post about this but I guess kailangan nyo rin makilala kung sino ang nag aalaga kay Rhian from Monday to Friday. Every guardian is different, hindi naman lahat ng yaya/guardian is perfect right? But let me introduced to you our very own, Tita Grace.

Tita Grace and Rhian (3 months old)

Tita Grace is 1^st cousin of my mom; she is single and ready to mingle. (chos!) She is 47 years old and we consider her as a family ever since her parents died. Inalagaan nya ko when I was a kid, nag aral kasi ako sa tondo kung saan sya nakatira. We lost our contact with her when I was in HS kasi sabi nya nag work daw sya as a baby sitter sa ka church mate nya. Fast Forward…. Actually we I got pregnant, I told tita grace na sya ang mag aalaga sa anak ko because I trust her. Mahirap kasing humanap ng mag aalaga sa baby lalo na sa mga nangyayari ngayon na ginugulpi yung baby pag wala yung parents, kaya when she visited us last April sabi ko na mag resign na sya sa work nya  as kasambahay at sa amin nalang sya tumuloy. We don’t consider her as yaya but instead we treated her as our guardian dahil mas matanda nga sya sa amin ni Ian and kamag anak ko sya.

1.        She loves Rhian so much.

-           I can actually feel that she love my daughter. Syempre apo na nya yun sa pamangkin db kaya natural lang na love nya to, pero Tita grace is super maalaga kay Rhian, naka ready na kakain ng anak ko pag lunch (although ako nagsasabi kung anong kakain nya), pinapa dede nya on time (stash of my breast milk), pinapatulog (hele), and hina-hot bath pag hapon. So every time na uuwi ako from work, super bango and linis ni Rhian.

2.        She’s our 2^nd mother

-          Since she came into our life, Ian and I treated her like our 2^nd mom. She prepares our breakfast every morning, she washes our clothes every weekend (kasi sabi nya pahinga nalang namin yun), sometimes mas strict pa sya kaysa sa asawa ko pag dating sa mga sinusuot ko which I find it okay (at least db concern sya sa akin). Kaya pag umaalis kami, I make sure na kasama namin sya, but sometimes ayaw nyang sumama kasi mas gusto nyang matulog at magpahinga. (Btw, she has 1 whole day day-off ha which is every Sunday.) 

During Ian's Birthday Celebration

Celebrating our 2nd Wedding Anniversary!

Although she’s nice, meron ring downside ang attitude nya. My mom told me na habaan nalang naming ang pacensya namin kasi ng matandang dalaga na and baka daw nag away sila ng jowa nya. (Yes, Tita Grace has boyfriend pero untiul now di pa rin nya pinapakilala sa amin.) So ano yung mga concerns ko sa kanya? Well marami rin. Hehe. Kasi tama rin sila na mas mahirap pakisamahan/pagsabihan ang kamag-anak kesa sa ibang tao.

Downside of Tita Grace.

1.        Sumpong

Image from here.

-          Yes! Naku pag yan tinopak asahan mon a nag dadabog yan at di ka papansinin. Since day 1 nya sa amin until today (5 months), pinaka Malala nyang topak was last October 5 wherein almost 1 week nya kaming hindi pinansin and puro dabog ang narinig namin. I still remember that night nung pag uwi nya ng bahay and all of a sudden bigla bigla na naman nag dabog. I told my husband na may topak na naman si Tita that’s why I asked for his help na mag ayos, magluto at mag alaga kay Rhian at hayaan nalang sya magkulong sa taas. The following day, I thought wala na yung sumpong nya but I was wrong, mas lalong lumala pa!  Every morning, her routine was to play with Rhian, as in kukulitin nya si Rhian ng kukulitin, that morning was different. Ni si Rhian hindi nya pinansin kahit na yung anak ko is naka ngiti na sa kanya and nagpapa karga. I can’t control myself kaya napaiyak talaga ako, naawa ako sa anak ko kasi para bang nanibago sya. Nasaktan ako but I can’t confront Tita grace kasi sabi ni Mommy bayaan ko nalang daw, but it hurts pala pag nakita mong parang nadismaya yung anak mo, imagine a 8-month old baby smiling at you and NR yung taong nginitian nya. So that very moment I told my husband na mag leave ako just to take care of my daughter. Mahirap nab aka di nya maalagaan ng maayos si Rhian or worst baka masaktan pa nya. (pero my husband doubt it, kasi di naman daw sasaktan ni Tita si Rhian kasi love nya to) but to tell you honestly, di ako panatag iwan ang anak ko sa kanya that day kaya kahit na schedule namin mag grocery that night, I decided to bring my daughter with me. Well, hindi naman araw2 may sumpong tita ko, once a month lang which last for about 2-3 days, pero yung recently is tumagal ng  1 week. Can you imagine that, ang hirap sobra!

2.        Lost Items

-          Super sipag ni tita, and I don’t have any questions about it. Yun nga lang minsan sa sobrang paglilinis nya, natatapon na nya yung ibang important things namin or sometimes she forget kung saan nya nilagay yun. One time, my husband was looking for something he left at the cabinet and when he didn’t find it she asked me to check it with Tita Grace, tapos malalaman nalang namin na naitapon na pala nya. My husband got mad at me, syempre di naman sya pwedeng magalit sa tita ko (he still respect my tita) so ako naman, nainis sa kanya kasi sa akin sya nagagalit. Another thing is mahilig syang kumuha ng gamit ko without asking my permission, magugulat nalang ako minsan gamit na nya yung gamit ko or minsan napamigay na nya sa friend nya yung gamit ko. Like for example yung new lotion that my husband bought to me, hinanahap ko sya dun sa lagayan ko kasi bago pa nga sya and dun ko sya nilagay so I asked her kung san nya nailagay  or nakita nya yun but she denied it, then I found an empty bottle of my lotion at the trashcan located at her room. Hayz. I didn’t confronted her hinayaan ko nalang kasi baka sumpungin na naman sya at kawawa naman anak ko db.

3.        Toys in a box

Image from here.

-          I told you na super malinis sa bahay si tita grace, ligpit sya ng ligpit ng gamit namin kaya pati mga toys ni Rhian nakaligpit. I told tita grace na ilabas lahat ng toys nya and let my baby play with it. Kaya nga namin binili yung mga toys and books para ma explore ni Rhian yun and makapag laro, but she keeps on hiding those toys in a box. As in pag uwi ko yung mga laruan nya nasa loob ng box kaya when I got home ilalabas ko lahat yun and hahayaan ko ang anak kong maglaro.

4.        Bad Words

Image from here.

-          Tita grace always talked to my daughter, wala naman akong against dun in fact mas gusto ko nga yun para maging madaldal or maagang mag salita si Rhian, but ang pinaka ayaw namin ni Ian is yung laging nyang sinasabi sa anak ko, “BAHO”, “Si Rhian BAHO”, “MABAHO” alam mo yun, tama bang asarin mo yung baby ng BAHO because of her poop or wiwi. Ayaw ni Ian yun kasi maa absorb ng bata yun. I think for the whole day nakaka 100 times syang bangitin yun. So what will be my daughter’s first word, “BAHO”?! WTF!  Instead of teaching my daughter ABC, yan ang lagi nyang naririnig. Hayz! Kaya pag nasa bahay ako and sinasabi nya yun, pinuputol ko sya and iniiba yung usapan. Again, nasabi na namin sa kanya na wag ng magbabangit nun kay Rhian but still she continue what she’s talking about. Hayz.

5.        Busy as bee

Image from here.

-          Again, super sipag ni Tita as in walang oras na makikita mo syang nakaupo. Lahat gagawin nya kahit wala naman dapat gawin, gets. So I told her nap ag tulog si Rhian sabayan nya ng tulog para makabawi sya or kaya naman higa lang sya. Then pag gising naman anak ko hayaan lang nya maglaro but syempre dapat nakatingin parin sya baka mya mauntog, may masubong gamit or masaktan. Pero si tita iba, pag tulog si Rhian gagawa sya ng gagawa sa taas namin, maglilinis ba so sometimes or I think most of the time nasa taas sya while my baby is sleeping sa baba. So imagine, walang kasamang matulog anak ko sa baba, e what if magising yun or kaya naman matakpan yung mukha nya at di makahinga. Did you get what I mean? Hindi dapat iwanan yung baby mag isa. Another thing is, hinahayaan lang nya nan aka tutok anak ko sa TV mag hapon, even though I told her na ilabas si Rhian ng bahay para may makita naman iba or ipasyal nya sa labas. I want my daughter to expose sa ibang kids para matuto sya ng social skills.

But still kahit ganon si Tita, most of my instructions sinusunod naman nya. I also asked for my mom’s assistance when it comes to my tita, syempre mas nakikinig sya kay Mommy kesa sa akin db.. We need a lot of patience lalo na ang hirap maghanap ng mag aalaga sa baby. I know she won’t hurt my daughter and I’m still hoping na magbago pa sya and sumunod sya sa mga sinasabi namin. Kaya di nila ako masisi na pumapasok ako ng late and nauwi ng maaga because I want to check my daughter and to see her milestones every day.